Skip to main content

Alone Again Naturally

At 9:45 Saturday morning my last caretaker left, leaving me alone again. Despite some concern from some friends and family, I was looking forward to having my place to myself. My friend Susan wasn't really a caretaker; she was great company, helped me get things, did laundry, and was here if I needed her.  One of the challenges of being on the scooter is thinking of everything I need to do before I sit down; inevitably, once I sat down I needed to ask for something -- glass of water, a scissor, a pen, a fork.  Like any good guest, Susan stripped the bed, loaded the washing machine, and there the bedding sits two days later.

Susan and Zora became fast friends!

Although my friends and neighbors continue to encourage me to ask for help, it is awkward to have them come over to pick up my mess or do my laundry.  Last night some friends came over to pick up my porch rug that I am not using anymore, and they sincerely asked if they could do anything for me.  Bob took out the garbage and recycling and wheeled my bins to the street.  But I stopped short of asking them to move the wash into the dryer or putting away Zora's birthday gifts.

The irony is that when I ask people to help they seem so appreciative to be able to do something.  some neighbors have actually thank me for asking for help because they weren't sure what they could do.  So why am I so hesitant?  I do ask, but I feel like I should be able to care for myself and don't want to take advantage of the kindness of others.

As I started to write this yesterday I was feeling sorry for myself for the first time since having the ankle replacement.  I was looking at a week in a scooter at home by myself, feeling good and not being able to do much.  As the day went on, I cancelled my plans to go to my son's barbecue -- his Meatwave.  It was just too much of an effort and Val, who was driving me, was having a bad day as well.  Instead, I watched several episodes of the old and new Lost in Space.  I heated up some leftovers and called it an early night.

But then this morning I woke up thinking how lucky I was to be able to have had the procedure so that I can walk in the future.  I am recovering quickly and well.  So, if I need to take it easy and read, and watch TV, and write thank you notes, and color, who am I to wallow in pity?  My new attitude is to embrace relaxation, play with the doggie, and be grateful for everyone walking Zora, bringing me food, and offering me support.

There is an end in sight for things like laundry, cooking, and straightening the house.  By the end of the month I can start to walk with the boot, and that will give me a lot more independence.  However, I cannot drive until the end of June, and that leaves me with great angst.

A little fancier scooter



Immediately after the ankle replacement it was easy to sit in my recliner, have meals brought to me, and do nothing else.  I hurt, and I wanted to heal, and I had no desire to do anything else.  Then, as I got around more, I took great delight in what I could do.  Now I feel pretty damn good, and that actually makes this more difficult.  I cannot walk my dog and walking in a boot is going to be a challenge with a dog who does pull.  I should have taught her to heel before I had the surgery.  My plan is to hire a neighbor who is a dog trainer to teach her how to heel.  In the mean time, I did a little research on walking a dog while using a scooter, and it seems possible!






The biggest challenge is that I cannot drive until the end of June!  Just imagine all the reasons you hop into your car -- quick trip for groceries, movies, the pool, manicure, hair cut, etc.  Now I either need to call a friend or call Uber.  Thank goodness for Uber, but that also means a financial investment in getting around, but I am grateful that won't be a challenge.  I'll probably spend less on car sharing because I won't be shopping as much!






Comments

  1. GRATEFULDONApril 26, 2018 at 7:08 AM

    I appreciate hearing about your journey! I am a friend of your sister. I am also entertaining the idea of ankle replacement and looking forward to hearing about your healing process. As of now I am putting off the surgery. I am afraid of the unknown! That is where your blog comes into play.
    Wishing you a speedy and successful recovery!
    Don

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Faye BrennerApril 29, 2018 at 11:34 AM

      Don, thank you for your best wishes. My sister told me that she was giving you the link. I kept the blog to help others: I could find so little on an ankle replacement. The first time my doctor talked about a replacement was about 3 years ago, and it finally got to a point where it was not a choice. I couldn't walk more than a couple of blocks anymore. Find out what kind of ankle replacement the doctor will do. I was surprised how many different ones exist. I had the Vantage, which has only been done for about a year and a half, but with excellent reviews. I think it's the only one that doesn't use any type of cement. I know someone who had success with the STAR, which seems to be the most popular. My other friend who had it done is very unhappy, but the problem seems to be nerve damage rather than the ankle itself. Good luck, and if you have any questions when you start to think about it, let me know.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Physical Therapy: It Comes with a Crush

The first couple of times I asked my surgeon about physical therapy, he said it wasn't necessary.  He was quite definitive: "You don't need physical therapy."  At my three month follow-up, after telling him I was frustrated with my inability to walk correctly, he finally gave me a prescription for PT in order to improve my gait.  My first appointment was today, and by the first five minutes I developed a crush on my therapist. It isn't a romantic crush (although he is very cute): it is a crush on someone who listened to me and responded to my concerns, hopes, and questions.  Here he is in an introductory video on YouTube. ( Click on the name below the photo. ) Stephen Mills, PT, DPT After brief introductions, it was clear that he read my chart.  He asked me if I walked my daughter down the aisle at her wedding (one of my goals before surgery).  He told me how great it is that I travel.  He was talking to me face-to-face without a comp...
Post a Comment
Read more

Three-Month Follow-Up: My Big Toe Works!

I was going to begin this post with a cliche such as "I can't believe it's already been three months," but that isn't exactly true.  In some ways it seems like the ankle replacement was so long ago that I am surprised it has only been three months.  I've been complaining about my lack of progress, but my doctor and his teaching fellow both said that "I've come a long way, baby!" The appointment started with x-rays in a variety of stances, including the one above that shows the ankle replacement as well as the arthroplasty or fusion of the heel.  When the fellow (I regret that I do not remember her name; she was also present at the operation, but I slept through our introductions) listened to my concern about my progress, she was the first to tell me that the fusion would prolong the recovery time.  The swelling of the ankle is evident in the x-ray, but she also said that the inflammation was as expected, and, in fact, it was relative...
Post a Comment
Read more

Three Steps Backwards and Five Steps Forward

I haven't posted in three weeks, even though a great deal has happened since I started physical therapy.  Having taken a turn for the worse and being back on my recliner, I started to write a travel memoir and writing two pieces seemed overwhelming.  Also, and even more importantly, I was in so much pain that I didn't want to put down my thoughts until I knew my recovery took a turn for the better. My physical therapist, Stephen, gave me four exercises to do that were not challenging.  He observed that I was walking with my right foot out, so he suggested that I concentrate on keeping it  straight.  I was given the green light for water aerobics, and was walking Zora twice a day. I was very happy.  Walking was not without pain, but I was walking and the last time I did water aerobics I actually was able to walk and push off of the wall rather than doing the dog paddle, like I did the first few times. Then it all went bad. The pain came suddenly...
Post a Comment
Read more